Thursday 9:57 p.m.
Three other people who think they should be running the country are just answering the last question of the first televised debate ever before a British election.
The Scottish boy has the same disease as I have, that thing about his lips. The cracking and scabbing. I think I could make a killing with him and the Zorro mask.
The fascist basturn looked like a Clanger. Oliver Postgate invented the Clangers. They lived on the Moon. They made weird whistling noises instead of speaking English. They done him in by sticking him in the middle and somebody should get shot for the make-up, and the wig. The Scottish boy showed his class. The Englanders won't care. They are stupid and will vote for the Clanger. Fung them. Long live the Socialist Republic of Chilly Jockoland where creekit is banned and everything is for free.
The wee boy on the side admitted to sh**ging thirty women once.I think once he had a jobbie as a ski instructor. George Simenon claimed to have sh**ged 10,000 women. I tell kids this when I'm talking about writers. You can see the smart ones counting it up. One a day for how long ... He started when he was thirteen during the blackout in Belgium when he was out and about doing the black market thing. I'll count them up now for myself. I have sh@@@ed no women at all. I think all the women out there should vote for moi!
Shoot everyone who is too dumb to meditate. Shoot everyone who works more than fifteen hours a week. Shoot everyone who believes in capital punishment.
The Scottish boy did us proud. I think once he has on the Zorro mask with the scabs painted on he might even get elected.
I meditated all day today and then I went to the allotment to hide. Albert interrupted my journey, sneaking up on me. He doesn't look so bad once you've seen him once before. I showed him the hut and the hole therein. He did not offer to fix it. Or even spend some of the nazi gold on buying me a new hut. I don't think the folk who speak to me realise that this kind of thing is what lands you in hell. Everyone I speak to should offer me something. And then I'll try to give them something better back. I'm trying to emanate as the Medicine Buddha. If I got this right, that's the way it should work eventually. I can't sit all night in the hut with a rat visiting me this summer. If I can't do that, yous are all funged. Well, yous are all funged anyway being basically too dumb to meditate to start with. Allah Akbar
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9 comments:
The clanger comparison is good. Send that to the paper. If it catches on, you could end up influencing the election. Imagine how you'd feel, doing something useful!
PS I've got the thick leprous lip today. Did you kiss me when I wasn't looking? The closet door's opening just as the hut's falling apart. It all balances out.
Uh isn't shooting everyone that doesn't meditate a form of capital punishment? Me thinks your argument has a few holes in it.
I also think you need to turn off the TV and go dig instead of getting so wound up over politics.
Albert? According to immediate opinion polling, Brown came last. I think I'll give up on democracy. Or opinion polls. Brown won by a mile. Hotboy
Marie! Shooting everyone who approves of capital punishment is a good idea. You're right about the digging versus the politics. Since you're a citizen now, you'll be able to vote. Hotboy
I say!
Since the passing of Idi Amin, Scotland has been without a king, and I think that Sean Connery should be the next one. He could move the country to Marbella, where you would all enjoy better weather.
MM III
Mingin'! That's a good idea, but once again you are too modest. Don't you fancy being the king and moving the country to the Bongo Bongo so we could have a decent football team to support. Hotboy
Aye I will and have my poll card all ready.
I say!
I fear that life in Kalimbuka might be a bit rough for you.
MM III
Mingin'! I'm from Bellshill. Kalimbukky would be a doddle compared to Bellshill! Hotboy
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