Monday 9:00 p.m.
Hotboy, since there is no one else except you and me reading this stuff, why don't you just have a wee go at telling the spam robots about the bliss? Okay, Jack, I will tell you about the bliss I've just had before getting to the computery thing.
Tired eyed off the couch and too late to go to meditate with the nun, I sat down in the lobby. You close your eyes, take refuge, then ...
Bliss is a compounded thing. The more you get of it, sometimes the more compounded it seems. It has components.
Sometimes over the years it has seemed as if you were sitting in the middle of a light sword from Star Wars. That's actually not a bad analogy. You can sometimes be very whitied out and the bliss seems to be flat and thin, but still bloody wonderful.
Tonight it was straight into the light sword stuff, but these days it seems a lot thicker somehow, with more depth to it. More potential for heat as well.
There are thoughts arising during this bliss state. The more thoughtless, the more profound the bliss perhaps, but the bliss is like a backdrop somehow, except it's not in the back! You are totally immersed in the bliss.
If I was a bit better at meditating, I should probably just leave it there. Just be in the bliss. Of course, the stuff you might do after this initial exposure to the bliss creates more bliss, and helps bring out other fascinating components. I was just about to do the chakras and whatnot when the door opened and Domestic Bliss was in the lobby.
I find it very frustrating that no one else I know gets this, at least nobody I know in Chilly Jockoland. What a different world it would be if everyone got the bliss!! Oh, ra bliss, ra bliss, ra bliss!
Monday, 9 November 2009
Monday, Monday!
Monday
Safer shores approach! Tonight I will run out of bob hope and can start tackling the Nicotine Dragon again. Also, I have almost reached the limit to my overdraft for this month and this does give moi a little protection from the temptations of cavorting with the flatheids.
The meditations continue to improve and amaze despite all the bad behaviour. I've regretted not being able to fully describe the bliss and such to yous flatheids, but at the end of the day I've decided that it doesn't really matter. If I could describe the after-effects particulary of vase breathing, it wouldn't make any difference. I can totally see the hinayana point of view. Flatheids are flatheids. They're too dumb to meditate and too dumb even to know they're flatheids. I didn't start meditating because of promises of bliss.
Though I haven't managed to convince one single flatheid to start meditating in the four years or so I've been writing these blogs, I have managed to totally convince myself, and that's really what matters. These vajrayana meditations are the most wonderful thing on this sweet earth! When the chakras start opening from the bottom up and you get to the mid-brain chakra ... well, we're definitely not in Kansas anymore! One of these days every cell in my body will be bursting with bliss. One of these days every breath will bring bliss with it.
The viewing figures on Statcounter have been falling away over the last couple of weeks. To cease blogging I need them down to nearly zilch, or for a couple of the folk who come here regulary to die. (Not you, Jack!)
Safer shores approach! Tonight I will run out of bob hope and can start tackling the Nicotine Dragon again. Also, I have almost reached the limit to my overdraft for this month and this does give moi a little protection from the temptations of cavorting with the flatheids.
The meditations continue to improve and amaze despite all the bad behaviour. I've regretted not being able to fully describe the bliss and such to yous flatheids, but at the end of the day I've decided that it doesn't really matter. If I could describe the after-effects particulary of vase breathing, it wouldn't make any difference. I can totally see the hinayana point of view. Flatheids are flatheids. They're too dumb to meditate and too dumb even to know they're flatheids. I didn't start meditating because of promises of bliss.
Though I haven't managed to convince one single flatheid to start meditating in the four years or so I've been writing these blogs, I have managed to totally convince myself, and that's really what matters. These vajrayana meditations are the most wonderful thing on this sweet earth! When the chakras start opening from the bottom up and you get to the mid-brain chakra ... well, we're definitely not in Kansas anymore! One of these days every cell in my body will be bursting with bliss. One of these days every breath will bring bliss with it.
The viewing figures on Statcounter have been falling away over the last couple of weeks. To cease blogging I need them down to nearly zilch, or for a couple of the folk who come here regulary to die. (Not you, Jack!)
Friday, 6 November 2009
Epistle to the Dakini
Friday 6 p.m.
The dakini emanated at the Silver Gate of the Botties yesterday and later we went off to get pissed. Mea culpa. I've decided to make the dakini my first convert to the Disbelieving Congregation. So I've just sent her this email. The dakini doesn't read this blog anymore, so I'll post any similar, haranguing emails in future.
Dear Dakini!
I've been thinking a lot today about you saying that I have not made any converts yet to the Disbelieving Congregation, of which I am certainly the sole representative and only member. In order to rectify this, I've decided to convert you since you are the only one who ever lets me talk about phenomenology.
The key to all this lies in your lungs. You are the only person I know whose lungs sound worse than mine. I've had three friends dying of lung diseases who have had better sounding lungs than that!
As you know, in the Disbelieving Congregation you don't have to give anything up and as I have succumbed once again to nicotine addiction, I am in the perfect position to offer advice.
It's not the cough that carries you off; it's the coffin they carry you off in!
It's good to give up coughing! But it is also good to be doing something to counteract the phlegm that rattles around, probably not doing you any good at all.
Here's how you give up coughing. Say susquehanna to yourself for two minutes. (Only two minutes!) Then tell yourself resolutely: I will stop coughing three times as a positive affirmation. Then take three huge breaths, one after the other, holding your breath for a bit when your lungs are full, and making sure you don't do that so long that you cannot attempt to completely empty your lungs. Squeeze the wheeze at the end.
Of course, I do not think you will empty your lungs, but will start coughing your guts up half way down. This is very good and will start to move the phlegm.
Then you can have a fag! It'll taste much better!
Just do it for your health. If you do it in front of others in the buddhafield, it might help put them off fags!!
If you started doing this every day, you would surely take your first steps on the road to heaven on this earth. If you do not start something like this, by the time you get to my age (if you live that long!), what will you face: a miserable, unhealthy old age characterised by grief, sorrow, lamentations ... delusions, disappointments and despair ... suffering in this life!! If you don't feel like doing this for yourself, you could try thinking about all the unhappy basturns you hang out with! Meditation should make you 2% more cheerful with every year. This is a huge amount! This will be a help to everyone you encounter. And you'll be able to call folk flatheids!
Just remember this is nothing to do with religion! It's self help. Flatheids are too stupid to even realise they are flatheids. Smart people should play the mind game because the mind game is the only game in town!
That'll be ten percent off the top! All the best! Hotboy
The dakini emanated at the Silver Gate of the Botties yesterday and later we went off to get pissed. Mea culpa. I've decided to make the dakini my first convert to the Disbelieving Congregation. So I've just sent her this email. The dakini doesn't read this blog anymore, so I'll post any similar, haranguing emails in future.
Dear Dakini!
I've been thinking a lot today about you saying that I have not made any converts yet to the Disbelieving Congregation, of which I am certainly the sole representative and only member. In order to rectify this, I've decided to convert you since you are the only one who ever lets me talk about phenomenology.
The key to all this lies in your lungs. You are the only person I know whose lungs sound worse than mine. I've had three friends dying of lung diseases who have had better sounding lungs than that!
As you know, in the Disbelieving Congregation you don't have to give anything up and as I have succumbed once again to nicotine addiction, I am in the perfect position to offer advice.
It's not the cough that carries you off; it's the coffin they carry you off in!
It's good to give up coughing! But it is also good to be doing something to counteract the phlegm that rattles around, probably not doing you any good at all.
Here's how you give up coughing. Say susquehanna to yourself for two minutes. (Only two minutes!) Then tell yourself resolutely: I will stop coughing three times as a positive affirmation. Then take three huge breaths, one after the other, holding your breath for a bit when your lungs are full, and making sure you don't do that so long that you cannot attempt to completely empty your lungs. Squeeze the wheeze at the end.
Of course, I do not think you will empty your lungs, but will start coughing your guts up half way down. This is very good and will start to move the phlegm.
Then you can have a fag! It'll taste much better!
Just do it for your health. If you do it in front of others in the buddhafield, it might help put them off fags!!
If you started doing this every day, you would surely take your first steps on the road to heaven on this earth. If you do not start something like this, by the time you get to my age (if you live that long!), what will you face: a miserable, unhealthy old age characterised by grief, sorrow, lamentations ... delusions, disappointments and despair ... suffering in this life!! If you don't feel like doing this for yourself, you could try thinking about all the unhappy basturns you hang out with! Meditation should make you 2% more cheerful with every year. This is a huge amount! This will be a help to everyone you encounter. And you'll be able to call folk flatheids!
Just remember this is nothing to do with religion! It's self help. Flatheids are too stupid to even realise they are flatheids. Smart people should play the mind game because the mind game is the only game in town!
That'll be ten percent off the top! All the best! Hotboy
Wednesday, 4 November 2009
Thank God It's Wednesday!
Wednesday 11:08 p.m.
The whatever it is, which fills the sheath with bliss and warmth and the wonderful pushing and stretching, is coursing through my upper shoulders and neck area as I write this.
The old, toothless one and I are really starting to nail this run. I became such an old fat basturn over the summer. You think you'll never get it back. This is it. You've lost it. You're coughing and spluttering, lugging yourself around. Painful psychologically. Then, by tonight, I felt as if I was flying in comparison. There's nothing like running. You never get that kind of breathing when you are cycling. Tonight on the hills I got way down passed the wheeze! It was great, so it was!
Then at ten I settled down in the living room in front of the telly with the Domestic Bliss. I've got the headphones on and my eyes closed. Maid In Manhatten is the movie that's on. So much bliss!
Unfortunately, once more I dance the dance of death with the Nicotine Dragon. I guess I'll have to set my mind on giving up smoking the bob, getting back to the cannybliss yogurts, or just giving up in the New Year and trying to clear off my debts.
I have a full appointments diary until Sunday. On Saturday night, a Beach Boys evening is on down at Brian Wilson's castle in Porty with moi and FungI Dave in attendance. I may have to go to hospital on Sunday.
The whatever it is, which fills the sheath with bliss and warmth and the wonderful pushing and stretching, is coursing through my upper shoulders and neck area as I write this.
The old, toothless one and I are really starting to nail this run. I became such an old fat basturn over the summer. You think you'll never get it back. This is it. You've lost it. You're coughing and spluttering, lugging yourself around. Painful psychologically. Then, by tonight, I felt as if I was flying in comparison. There's nothing like running. You never get that kind of breathing when you are cycling. Tonight on the hills I got way down passed the wheeze! It was great, so it was!
Then at ten I settled down in the living room in front of the telly with the Domestic Bliss. I've got the headphones on and my eyes closed. Maid In Manhatten is the movie that's on. So much bliss!
Unfortunately, once more I dance the dance of death with the Nicotine Dragon. I guess I'll have to set my mind on giving up smoking the bob, getting back to the cannybliss yogurts, or just giving up in the New Year and trying to clear off my debts.
I have a full appointments diary until Sunday. On Saturday night, a Beach Boys evening is on down at Brian Wilson's castle in Porty with moi and FungI Dave in attendance. I may have to go to hospital on Sunday.
Tuesday, 3 November 2009
The Bus Bliss
Tuesday.
"The visions of the forms of the Deities which appear in meditation are merely signs attending the perseverance in meditation. They have no intrinsic worth or value in themselves." Milarepa.
My Auntie Kathy says you'll always have trouble with your teeth until you get them all pulled out. My dentist had a heart attack a couple of weeks ago and this coincided with one of my fillings going mental. I got most of it fixed yesterday by a locum. The real pain is when you have to pay, which we do now in Chilly Jockoland because the New Labour basturns aren't socialists.
As soon as the boy zoomed the seat back, I was doing the bliss and trying to visualise the Medicine Buddha. In the presence of the locum, the dental assistant seemed a bit frisky. She patted my arm and said I was her wee pal. A very nice looking girl indeed! If they'd just put up a sign saying she'd suck the teeth right out of your mouth, business would boom!
The last time I went meditating on a Monday night with the nun was about June. So it was interesting to go last night and see how the space behind the eyes had developed.... there's a lot of this kundalini stuff filling out the sheath these days. And you might be meditating away there good style when it all seems to open up somehow into even more bliss and light. I wonder if this is the "channels" opening, or the "winds" entering the central channel. This has been going on since the summer anyway. A real delight when this happens.
9:45 p.m.
Today in the bus to work I didn't sit in my usual style. Normally, I put my knees up on the seat in front and curl onto my bag. But today I felt very blissed after the morning meditation and sat up like a normal joe. What amazing bliss! That's the best it's ever been on the bus. Such bus bliss! Whatever next!
Sunday, 1 November 2009
FungI Dave
Sunday 2:30 p.m.
FungI Dave, the joe with the unfortunate diagnosis, has been coming to see me about once a week. This is very good. He's about the only one of my friends who isn't a complete basturn. His health is still okay, but he does not seem to be too interested in the meditations, and I don't blame him. However, we do have a good laugh, smoking dope, drinking, and on Friday he brought down some magic mushrooms.
The last time I got a dose was down at FungI Dave's one Hogmanay. He handed me some wrapped in a bit of kitchen roll. If you squeezed it in your hand, it would between the size of a golf ball and tennis ball. I'm not very good at keeping things for later, so I just ate whatever it was. No idea how many there were.
Dave told me on Friday night that he just hoped I wasn't going to die. My head went down on the kitchen table. He said there was a picture of George Bush on the kitchen wall. (Must have been a cartoon!) He said he knew I'd lost it when I took off my shoes one after the other and threw them at the picture. I took twenty five mushrooms on my way to the bliss bath yesterday. It wasn't as good as the straight bliss bath, but interesting, of course. But I must have taken a helluva lot of mushrooms yon Hogmanay!
About thirty years ago, I took some mushrooms and watched my ego (none too pretty) globulate across my vision.
About that time, we always used to think that Poisonous might not live long since he sometimes went grey and passed out. What would we do if he snuffed it?
... Take your old lady by the feet, drag her into the darkened street, and tomorrow morning she's just another hit and run.... (the Initimable Lou)
I checked my pulse on the way home from Bellshill on Friday, after sitting in the train for about an hour. 53 beats a minute. My nephew, Froggy McDuck, who is into rowing,has a resting heartbeat of 45! I expect mine to run at 60.
The model of my home planet is actually red, but comes out white. I took the photie because I sometimes sit in the dark staring at it. The pig it met on Skye this summer. He told me The Alien Creatures from Outer Space weren't going to let me go home unless I stopped drinking and (especially!!) smoking, and being a complete disgrace. Everything is a work in progress, Jack!
Life is much better now that the Domestic Bliss is home!
Thursday, 29 October 2009
Resume!
Thursday 4:15 p.m.
Whilst the Domestic Bliss was having a kip to get over the transatlantic travels, I checked out the difference in the lobby. I can't say I've enjoyed the last ten days or so, but it seems that it has been worth it. Tons of bliss and some warmth even at the worst time of the day, late afternoon. What I have to do now is stay off the smoking and stop drinking!
Folk often come to my blogs looking for stuff on vase breathing. I backtracked to google from the statcounter thing. The first five entries are to my blogs and they've all got green signs on them since they have been "promoted" by someone. And not moi! Maybe they've been a wee bit of help to some other nutter!
10:55 p.m.
What a sensible law they passed here a wee while ago! You can't sell carry-outs after ten o clock at night now. Peckhams were selling alk till twelve up till then, but now if you get to ten, that's it. Great!
Shadow boxed tonight after a fabulous meditation, bathed and now I'm going to bed sober and straight. That's the way to do it! I feel much happier now that the Domestic Bliss is back in town.
Whilst the Domestic Bliss was having a kip to get over the transatlantic travels, I checked out the difference in the lobby. I can't say I've enjoyed the last ten days or so, but it seems that it has been worth it. Tons of bliss and some warmth even at the worst time of the day, late afternoon. What I have to do now is stay off the smoking and stop drinking!
Folk often come to my blogs looking for stuff on vase breathing. I backtracked to google from the statcounter thing. The first five entries are to my blogs and they've all got green signs on them since they have been "promoted" by someone. And not moi! Maybe they've been a wee bit of help to some other nutter!
10:55 p.m.
What a sensible law they passed here a wee while ago! You can't sell carry-outs after ten o clock at night now. Peckhams were selling alk till twelve up till then, but now if you get to ten, that's it. Great!
Shadow boxed tonight after a fabulous meditation, bathed and now I'm going to bed sober and straight. That's the way to do it! I feel much happier now that the Domestic Bliss is back in town.
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