It Creepith Uppith!

Saturday 2:11 a.m.
It started when I read The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying. The boy mentioned how you could do something for dead people.

This is what you miss if you don't have a religion. You can't do anything for yourself when folk die. The boy in the book said you could remember dead people and kind of dedicate meditations to them ... or just remember them somehow. This is comforting. There is no reason why this should be comforting for the dead people. Anyway, I started picturing all the dead people I knew close to the start of my meditations. I'm kind of embarrassed about this because it's almost like praying for someone.

The Tibetan Buddhism I do, which might be my own kind of Tibetan Buddhism, is like Catholicism cubed i.e. tripled.

So I'm getting these faces up, of all my dead relatives and friends, a growing number of basturns by the way and not all of them very friendly!

Once I'm talking to this joe I know who's dying and he's thinking about going to Switzerland to top himself. Says I, that might not matter if your body has a mind, but it might matter if your mind has a body. Then the flatheids, my deep dear friends, said I had to go and talk to him about this. This is quite embarrassing since what the fung do I know? I don't believe in believing in things. I believe in not believing in things.

After reading the Tibetan Book of Living and Dying (which was big help to moi, but not something I could entirely recommend), I did start going through the increasing list of dead flatheids I knew.

Then I started trying to dedicate the merit of meditations to folk who were dead for the 49 days it said you might spend in the bardo between death and rebirth. I did this for relatives though I wasn't sure if this was a good thing really. But it was good for me since I helped me to get over their deaths.

Then I read about Ion's old man dying and said I'd do the 49 day thing for him because it is very difficult for atheists and folk without any good way of dealing with stuff like that(which you do get from religious rituals!) and I thought I'd offer since there wasn't anything else I could offer. Also, I had no one to dedicate merit to. Even if there no merit to dedicate, as part of the mind game, it's not got to be all about moi!

Then there was Peter Bollocks, whom I had a picture to think on, and the kid who was stillborn. Getting my head round that one was really hard. That's got tragedy mixed in as well.

Now my deep dear friend who has been handed the black spot says he'd like to come round and meditate on Thursdays. After all.

All these dedications and whatnot have been extremely good for me. I don't know if they've made any difference to the folk I've been dedicating these meditations to, but the process of doing it is a very useful ploy in the mind game. It really is.

The story goes that to gain a human existence you have as much chance as there would be if a turtle rose from the ocean floor every hundred years and somehow managed to surface with it's head arising through a floating ring.

I want to be able to demonstrate raising inner heat to this joe and I can't do that yet. But I'd try harder if he came down to meditate, so him coming down here would be much better for me than for him. He's a flatheid and has never meditated.

The preciousness of human existence is one of them four foundations I believe. To help make you want to practise.

Do we have to go to the charnel grounds, Jack? No, Hotboy, the charnel grounds are all around you! We've all got the black spot. Tempis fugit. Dearie, dearie me!

Can you reiterate to the spam robots what you actually believe in then, Hotboy? Jack, I don't know anything, so how can I believe in anything?