Wednesday 3:25 p.m.
There is something funny happens sometimes with the breathings, Jack, which I thought I might share with you.
Sometimes I've been trying to hold my breath and I've been unable to do so for more than a few seconds. The outbreath comes quickly partly because I am unsure of the reaction in my body. Sometimes there have been judderings in the past. But mainly there are times when the body is hardly able to retain breath at all. This is far less than occurs with a normal joe or josephine. I don't know why that is, but when it was happening it did feel quite odd. It's been a good while since I've had this effect.
Usually, I'm struggling to hold my breath for a minute. Because the lama told me not to force it, and because it's too much of an effort, I probably don't hold my breath for more than thirty seconds normally. But then sometimes something a bit odd occurs.
It's as if you can't feel the breath inside your body properly. The squeeze you put in while holding the vase breath seems to be squeezing at a lot less, and the normal pressure you'd expect on your belly just isn't there. During these times, it is easier, much easier to hold your breath for a longer time.
I just don't know why that is or what's going on really, Jack. Since you've embraced your ignorance and began to engage more fully with experiential mysticism, Hotboy, you've got a lot more to be ignorant about than the Unfortunate Ones. Hmmmm?
Neither can I explain the large differences that seem to occur with these meditations week on week. Really I have no explanations for anything. But if you're not in it, you're definitely not going to win it.
I've only drank beer on Saturday out of the last seven days. Good boy! Shame I can't describe the bliss to you, Jack.
'For only he who passes this way can understand it, and even he cannot describe it.' The Wall. St John of the Cross.
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3 comments:
It makes sense that learning to vase breath would make the pressure in your body less. Because you aren't fighting everything else distracting you so you can just concentrate on breathing.
Since the I visited the relics I've been able to do this much more easily. Still have a lot of noise in my head. But I'm working on it.
Marie: I don't know why at some times of the day (not predictable yet) I can hold my breath for a minute and sometimes it's almost double that. Weird. The first inner heat experience I had might have been a system clearing/cleaning exercise. I don't know. Kriya, I think it might be called. Just don't know as usual! Hotboy
I say!
"For only he who passes this way can understand it, and even he cannot describe it.' The Wall. St John of the Cross."
Wasn't that one of Pink Floyd's?
MM III
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