The Bammer and Moi!

Thursday 7:11 p.m.
I read in the paper today that the Bammer spends an hour a day in the gym and has a heartbeat which is an 'impressive' sixty beats a minute at rest.

Bugger all impressive about that heart beat! My heart runs at 60 beats a minute when at rest and I'm a fat, drunken basturn, a good ten years older than the Bammer. Also, I'll take practically any kind of drugs as long as they're given to me for free.

It said in college he used to 'experiment' with drugs. When I was at college I also experimented with drugs, Jack, and so did practically everyone I knew. When we all left college, we experimented even more because we got jobs and had more money to spend on experimenting.

This has left me with a lot of bad habits. Even although I can get out of my face on air, I still experiment with drugs. I wonder if the Bammer still experiments. Probably still takes a toke. Let's hope he stays off the crack pipe. Adolf Hitler did smack and speed and look at what happened to him.

I'm not long out of the bliss bath after doing six threes. I felt actually quite fit tonight. Do you think you could take the Bammer in a square go, Hotboy? I'd moida da bum! Basketball does not prepare one for the fisticuffs. Also, if you want to be racist about it, there are no more murderous basturns than the Scots, apart from the Scots Irish, and moi is a mixture of these. Just as well I not going to be President. I'd nuke the lot of them, Jack. There are no sentient beings. Fung them!