Ram Bahadur Bomjon and the 3 Step Juju!

Friday 11:20 p.m.
The first step is the flatheid. That's just about everyone. Not a fung clue. Thinks everything is real. Has his/her head jammed well up their bum and accepts perceptions as ... anyway, lives in the impossible way of being and questions it not one little bit. This is the moron, the Prehensile Tail, The Evolutionary Tail, the pondlife idiot. Your normal human being.

(Am I allowed a comment from the class war here, Jack? Why not, Hotboy. Go ahead.

Given the neurotic parenting .. and the never being able to come home with your shoes dirty .. and always having to keep your room tidy .. and the marching up and down ... def, dight, def, dight, def dight .. you are geared to be in middle management ... always crawling up the arse of your superiors and always vicious to your inferiors like a proper little fascist ... well, you might as well blow your brains out since you are never going to get by the first step, which is being a flatheid. You're only hope is to just stop everything right now. You're just never going to get anything anyway better. Just blow your brains out. There is no past, no future and you are just a fung danger to everyone else in the present. A planet guzzling, sweetie eating, petite bourgeois worm.)

The second step is to emanate as a deity. Becoming a deity. Convince yourself of this and you might have a good laugh about it, you and I. Instead of being a flatheid, you are ... compassion and altruism, loving kindness, bliss and joy, heat and healing. Delve into the channels that you have invented and open them up. This is a very strange land to live in.

I'm havering on the second step a little because I cannot do this properly yet. Trying to combine the method and the wisdom in this maybe takes a bit more time and effort than I've got to give it right now, but ... it's a tool. You're not a deity, just as you're not really a flatheid. You just think you are.

We're in the skillful means here. The Kagyu Karma juju masters say they have the skillful means, and I think they might be right.

The third step involves surely the fantastic bliss that blows the first two steps away. It might be called the narvi ...navrilkapla samadhi ... wiki it ... it's probably called samadhi anyway ... it's what maybe the buddha boy is doing.

What is the buddha boy doing, Hotboy? I don't know, Jack. But his guru is a tibetan monastic and they're into raising the inner heat. But he's passed that.

I've never seen any monastics at the Samye Ling taking a deep breath. I've watched the abbot there sometimes for an hour at a stretch and I've never seen him taking a vase breath. I think they're all beyond that. I think there is maybe a bit you get when you close your eyes (you have to have been a good boy for this to have occurred, I think) and you get the openings and the totally exotic bliss, and you don't really need the deity bit in between.

"When we can see straightforwardly and non-conceptually the nature of your clear light mind and be able to become fully absorbed in that nature without ever having to regress from that, we have become a buddha." Dalai Lama.

That maybe what the buddha boy is doing, whatever method he's using. You could maybe just sit there and wait and not use any method at all and get there, but it might be a bit harder.

That'll be tenpercent off the top, please.