Thursday 3 September 2009

The Grand Ennui!

Thursday 10:50 a.m.
Remorselessly, the rain falls. I'm sure we didn't used to have days like this.

A plumber has arrived on my wonderful Thursday to fit the washing machine. But the Domestic Bliss will be out all evening and the kiddos are no bother. I can hide.

There will be more bliss today than ever before. I may get some heat. I am so extremely fortunate to be able to practise this juju. To be able to take a breath and fill your body with bliss! Who would have believed that this was possible? It is indeed a shame that the world is full of folk who do not practise the great vajrayana, the juju of jujus! This is the bliss! This is the bliss! This is the bliss!

10:00 p.m.
Subtleties may be involved, no doubt; little shadings here and there may make a difference. Taking twenty odd pints of good German beer (Achtung! Achtung!) out of the mindstream is bound to have an effect. Mental calming. Don't do stuff to agitate the mind. Equanimity is supposed to be the name of the game at the end of the day. Slaying the Nicotine Dragon once more is most satisfying in all kinds of ways. But you have to sometimes lie down and read a book. Like some sad basturn! It's not the meditations that are the problem; it's the rest of the time when you're not allowed to have fun; it's the onset of the grand ennui. No doubt if one waited long enough the happiness would come through ... longueurs is a good word. I wish I knew what it meant.

I do not have a problem with the above because I've been eating a big bit of soapbar of an evening. Something screams out that total abstinence is not my tao. I'm really not comfortable there for very long. Up to about nine o clock at night does me.

I didn't go out today. It's still raining. I stared at a candle for about four hours today. You get more bliss by keeping your eyes closed. Right into self mortification me. Then I did ten minutes skipping, twenty of Mr Iyengar's yogic jumpings,and three three minute rounds of shadow boxing.

The bath is a highlight more and more. Tonight the bath bliss was significantly different somehow. Then the bob hope came on and this new bliss was now the zonkeroony bliss, which is a falling away from the path, but what the hell! I haven't been eating much soapbar this year due to the jolly joints and the infrequency of supply, but I do love it. It suits me. It's my big sweetie at the end of the day.

I started on the re-write today. Be a completely different book. I'm going back to it's original title, Remote Control. Different characterisations and mucho humpings. Dismantelings and reassemblings. This will take years and years! I'm not sure that I shouldn't just stick with investigating the bliss, but I've had a year off. If I can stay off the beer, anything is possible!

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

I say!

No rain here in Kalimbuka. Wrong season for that.

MM III

Hotboy said...

Mingin'! Fortunate are yous in the bongo bongo! It's still raining here and has rained non-stop all day. And now it's dark and raining. But I haven't been out all day, so it's okay for moi! Hotboy

albert said...

Ah, the joys of staying warm and dry indoors when it's raining in Jockoland. A frequent pleasure if memory serves. Sorry yours was spoiled by having to attend to the tradesman's entrance (not in a gay way).

Hotboy said...

Albert? I'm sure you miss all the greetin faced crabbit basturns who have sometimes to go out and walk about in this dreich desolation! But fortunately not moi! Hotboy

Anonymous said...

I say!

"The bath is a highlight more and more."

Perhaps you're leading too much of an exciting lifestyle? Too adventurous? Too much activity?

MM III

Hotboy said...

Mingin'! My religion doesn't allow you to do anything in case it agitates your mind, so the quieter the better. This is the hard bit. Hotboy

rob said...

"My religion doesn't allow you to do anything in case it agitates your mind" - now I realise that our boy was a Blissheid all along.