Night time

Saturday 9:00 p.m.
When all dharmas are empty, what is endless? What has an end?
What is endless and with an end? What is not endless and not with an end?
What is it? What is other? What is permanent? What is impermanent?
What is impermanent and permanent? What is neither?

Auspicious is the pacification of phenomenal metastasis, the pacification of all apprehending;
There is no dharma whatsoever taught by the Buddha to whomever, whenever, wherever.

--Mūlamadhyamakakārikā, nirvṇānaparīkṣā, 25:22-24

Bellshill trees

Friday 5:00 p.m.
I'm finding it hard to settle into meditations at the moment. This is because I hardly meditated at all yesterday. I won't have a day without engagements till Sunday. Boo! Boo! Oh well, I'll go into the lobby now and get on with it.

The trees were in Bellshill today. The drawing on the wall was a gift from the kiddo for my birthday. I always tell her not to buy me anything, so she has to produce something instead. Hurrah! Her blog is full of artisticy things!

11:30 p.m.
You've got to remember that almost everything you think is a load of crap! Right after this "hard to settle" part of the post, I went into the lobby and settled wonderfully. There was the candlelight on the Medicine Buddha postcard and peace descending. Peace is great. So is serenity. I don't get that often enough due to the pollutions, I suspect. Anyway, that was great, the peace, and worth a memory.

After a wee break, I sat down again and the great white bliss space, as if everything is open, appeared almost immediately. This is the same as all the other blisses except it's not, and I don't know what it is. At one point, I thought of the image I used once about getting a wee hit off the bliss and it disappearing, and getting it right in your face staight off was just a matter of pulling it closer like you would if you were reeling in a fish. I thought: That's it. Smack in your face. This feels very nice, by the way. Doesn't last, of course. If it did, I wouldn't be blogging.

The meditation I had after that was just a bit so-so in comparison. The Domestic Bliss should have been home by then. Less focus maybe.

11:45 p.m.
Wells Fargo Publishing say we aren't getting a contract till next year since they can't bring the book out till next summer. Well, I thought next summer was when they said ... I knew they'd have no money!! But they want the book okay. So we wait. The first thing you learn is you always got to wait!

Blog On!

Wednesday 4:07 p.m.
I found another message from The Alien Creatures from Outer Space when I got in from the jobbie this afternoon. It says: Blog on!

Next Monday it'll be five years since I started blogging. Really, it was to track my attempts to get a literary agent. Next Monday looked like a good day to stop since it looks as if I've sold a book, thirteen years after Cyclists was published, and it is impossible to do proper justice to the progress of the meditations in mere words.

When I got back from London, I hadn't blogged for a week, and there was a comment saying: "Where is the bliss boy?" That made me laugh. And Jack the Spam Robot says it doesn't matter that the flatheids who come to this bloggy will never meditate no matter how wonderful my meditations become. That's their tough luck! Little Jack's existence depends on this blog and, like everyone else, he doesn't want to die! So let's just get on with it.

As the man said: It's not over till it's over! I haven't seen a contract yet and it looks like us useless basturns at the jobbie are not getting our jotters in this round of cuts after all. Boo! No wonder this country is going to the dogs! Maybe I'll have to wait till the fascists get back into government for my uselessness to pay off. Convergence maybe has to wait a year.

The meditation I had in the lobby, after the wee sleep I have when I get in from the jobbie, was wonderful ... Tomorrow would have been a fabulous time to bang in eight hours of doing juju, but .... my wonderful Thursday! I'm having to go to a memorial service tomorrow. I think it's been two months since I had a Thursday to myself, but it's not all about moi! Buggeration!

The Great Vajrayana, Juju of Jujus!

Monday 22:47
Do you know why vajrayana meditations are the best thing that ever happened to the human beings, Jack? Yes, Hotboy! The spam robots have been paying attention! Well, Jack, why is the juju of jujus the best thing that ever happened to the human beings?

Because, Hotboy, it has so much sheer pleasure attached to it! It seems to take you towards the source of pleasure, as if this pleasure was the root of pleasure and that all the little mundane pleasures are mere slivers from this root.

Bliss diary: I slept in for the nun, but had two fabulous meditations on my own instead, culminating in one finishing about half ten. That was a beezer! The channel that opens just keeps opening. This will be like the bliss. It's just going to get more and more.

Convergence. There are rumours that the folk doing my kind of jobbie are going to get their jotters for being a useless bunch of basturns. Hurrah! Cuts. About time! Here comes the hut! Here comes the hut!

Completion!

Monday 11:20 a.m.
The photies are of Inverleith Park on the way home from the hut yesterday.

I have to remember that I sold the BBBW ten years ago and it didn't get published because Element Books went belly up. But assuming it gets published this time.

I wanted another book published. That would make three. I might have preferred the McCoy book to be published since then I would have had three books published in very different styles. But the BBBW might be more of a help. Anyway, selling that to someone (wait for the cheque, Hotboy!) has made me feel that I don't have to do anything else in the writing line. I can put all that malarkey behind me. It's done. If the Glasgow publisher wants more books, I've already got more books. I'd like to write another book on travelling and buddhism, but unless I make some money to go back to the Himalayas, that'll never happen. That's alright.

The meditations are going really well as usual. That's all I really want to do.

Mainly Trees!

Saturday 9:30 p.m.
There are more trees in London than I thought. Just got back from seeing the kiddo. Being able to sink into the bliss almost as soon as you close you eyes at any time is not a bad thing to be able to do. And not just that. Being able to see emotions like anxiety as things to be observed and not immersed in is also not a bad thing to be able to do, especially when the first thing is not available.


What about the too dumb to meditate who will be able to do neither of the first two things, Hotboy? Well, Jack, Christ said know thyself. He didn't say crucify thyself!
Emptiness is form. Form is emptiness.

And why is it called form, Oh Great One? It is called form, Hotboy, because it is de-formed. It is de-formed by hot. It is de-formed by cold. It is de-formed by wind. It is de-formed by rain. It is de-formed by ice. It is de-formed by snow. It is called form, Hotboy, because it is de-formed. Form is emptiness. Emptiness is form.

Publisher

Friday 5:14 p.m.
So the publisher asked me what I wanted for the book. I said: How's about a grand? If I only had a grand, I could be a millionaire. A grand and ten percent of sales. He said: I'll give you £750 and 16% of sales. Done.